The Hillbilly Smoothie


Who would have thought Pattie Bagley would occupy three days in a row of posts! Simply unheard of. And I apologize in advance to anyone out there who is tired of hearing about this woman! But I have a third and final post that I could not resist. I know — I said I couldn’t resist yesterday too, but I promise this is the last post, at least for this year, about GBA’s Madame President!

So yesterday, while writing my investigative exposé on Miss Pattie, I sort of had a premonition when I stated the possibility of finding her ditching class again, and out in the woods sneaking moonshine. Well, I didn’t catch her in the woods. Instead, she invited us over for a quick visit at her new “vacation” cabin in the back hills of North Carolina. And while we were there, she made me her signature drink (extra emphasis on the “signature”) she dubbed the “Hillbilly Smoothie.”

There’s no instructional recipe but rather an ingredient list. Simply mix it all together the way you feel like it: Ice, Ginger Ale, Peaches (frozen work best) and some good ‘ole Moonshine! (try not to get arrested when out looking for some). Now before anyone gets serious on me, you can actually buy “legal moonshine” depending on what state you live in. So I’m not suggesting you do anything against the law! If you cannot get your hands on any moonshine, try Gin instead.

I have never tried moonshine before but I hear she has a knack for luring people in to her wicked ways. And I have to cautiously admit, her Hillbilly Smoothie was delicious! I mean everyone should try everything at least once, right? (We all know Pattie has!)

moonshine-pattieIn closing, I’d like to thank Miss Pattie for letting me tease and “expose” her sneaky ways to the basketry world.

As I wrote a couple days ago, It was all in good fun! Besides, I have since learned that she’s actually a Humanitarian of sorts… as she explained to me earlier today, because of her masterful and extraordinary weaving abilities, she periodically disappears from class so other students will feel less inferior.

So what I gathered was that her behavior was not from any laziness or goofing off, but rather a self-sacrificing commitment to others to mask her superior basketry genius.

I have one word for you Pattie…. Whateva!

***Disclaimer: What Pattie is holding could simply be water in a mason jar with a slice of lemon making it appear like it’s moonshine, therefore upholding her bad-Pattie image. Or it could be pure Vodka. Or Sprite. We will never know.

Now it’s Weaving & Massages?

So I planned on posting some pics of Eric’s basketry class from the John C. Campbell Folk School today along with some pretty campus imagery. However, when I came upon this, I could not resist.

After yesterday’s post bringing to light the behavior of GBA’s Madam President texting during Mr. Basketmaker’s class I had to dedicate another day’s assignment exposing Miss Pattie.

Today, as I was out for my multi-daily walk, I found her not in class like she was supposed to be, working on her rim and lid for the creel basket, but rather at the Farm House getting a 40-minute massage! And might I point out that 20-minute massages were being offered at the Farm House all day but no, not enough time for for this President. She needed a double — that’s a 40-minute session!

Yes, you read me right… Miss Pattie was lounging on a tie-dyed clad massage table this afternoon, getting her pink-nailed feet rubbed by a gentleman wearing a coral shirt!

Need proof? Well check out this candid pic! Yes, that is indeed Miss Pattie, with not a care in the world, or for her unfinished creel basket.

massage-basketryLike I said yesterday, she’s a “Bad Pattie…”

I wonder what she will be up to tomorrow. Instead of finishing her basket before the noon deadline, shall I stumble upon her out in the woods making moonshine?

If I do, y’all will be the first to hear about it! And maybe I’ll change the title of this blog to “Exposing the Life of a GBA President.” I’m thinking she would provide a year’s worth of material at least!

5 Questions Friday: No Texting & Weaving

Q: How long did it usually take us to get to John C. Campbell Folk School when we lived in New Hampshire?
Eric: Two long days in the car since I don’t like to drive more than 10 hours in one day before I have to teach for a week.

Q: So how awesome was it, to leave our house in Tennessee, and arrive at the campus in only 3 hours?
Eric: It was REALLY awesome. Exactly why we moved South. I’m not exhausted from sitting in a car for two days and staying at a grungy hotel.

Before I ask the next question, I need to share with you all (I mean y’all since I now live in the South) this picture I snapped at Mr. Basketmaker’s class this evening in Brasstown and who you are looking at.

Does anyone recognize her? Yes, it is the GBA’s Madam President Pattie Bagley and Resident Artist of the folk school, I might add. And she was caught pink-handed TEXTING during class! (get it… pink-handed because she has a pink phone… yeah… lame… I know.)

Yes, that is Miss Pattie in all her presidential glory! She is taking Eric’s weekend class and as you can see, her barely-begun creel basket is cast off to the side like a watered down drink while she gets some laughs from her texts. Bad Pattie!

Now this leads me to Mr. Basketmaker’s next question…

Q: I thought you had a NO Texting & Weaving Policy?
Eric: I do.

Q: Then why is this student texting?
Eric: Because it’s Pattie and her presidential power has gone to her head. She does what she wants.
(editor’s note: for those who are more on the serious side — we are just poking fun at our dear friend Miss Pattie! So all in good fun people! All in good fun! And Eric really doesn’t have an official “no texting” policy in his class. He just pretends he does.)

Q: What annoyed you this week?
Eric: Your brother and your Dad whining again about me, the Commissioner, and the league when it hasn’t even started yet!