Birthday-Eve With My Two Nephews

*** Thank you to all of you who emailed me to say there was something wrong with this post. Apparently I hit one little ‘wrong’ button and it took me a couple days to figure it out! Anyways, this email was written Wednesday evening and was posted early Thursday morning.

Today is my birthday. Mr. Basketmaker is at his workshop in Michigan. And I am at my sister’s home, visiting her and my two nephews. And what was so cool about the night before my birthday, is that my sister went to bed early and my nephews came up to the guest bedroom to spend time with me. And we really spent some time together!

Their bed time is 9 pm. I know this. But I can’t deny the fear of being the crazy-childless aunt. I want to be the fun, cool “no-rules” aunt (well, ‘no-rules’ for the little stuff of course).

So I asked them, since it was going to be my birthday tomorrow and due to the fact that they would be going to their dad’s house so I wouldn’t see them, if they wanted to stay up a little later past their bed time. They were totally on board. And it wasn’t so they could play video games or watch a few television shows or wrestle while playing their favorite game “100 shirts” (long story… ). Instead, they genuinely stayed up to spend time with me. Little ‘ole me. And what a time we had. Well, not a raucous kind of time, but a sharing and laughing and telling stories kind of time.

Each of us chimed in with our own tales of what we remembered about my various people in our family, and about what’s going on in their school and the friendships they have and what they look forward to in the future. Now, they are only 10 and 13 so it wasn’t any “heavy” future talk — some of the main ones for Sam was being able to drive or buying whatever he wanted and Ben’s was not to do math anymore and be able to cook all day. But it was enough that we were all engaging and showing how important each of us are to each other and the sharing of our small-sized dreams. And realizing this, I totally ignored the voice in my head that said “You should be a responsible adult and tell them to go to bed.” Especially since they do listen to me. I know this. And I could’ve easily said “time to go to bed” and they would’ve gotten up and did so.

But I couldn’t. I don’t have children myself. And neither does Eric. Yes, we do talk about what it would have been like to have children. But it is usually a two or three minute conversation. I appreciate that about Eric. He never dwells on “what might’ve been” or “what could’ve happened.” He lives for what we have today. And we do have an interesting life together. Despite being a minority in that we are not parents, our life is still fulfilling. And it’s not ordinary at all. And I appreciate that.

Especially during times like this, on the eve of my birthday, when I am able to be the whimsical, carefree aunt and talk about goofy things and laugh until it hurts with my two nephews, late into the night… and a “school night” at that!

When 10 pm rolled around I told them they would be really tired tomorrow morning and they should probably go to bed. And they both said “we won’t be tired!” (Yes, I believed that.) And shortly after that I reiterated that their mom would be upset with me if she knew that I let them stay up this late and they both said “I won’t tell if you don’t.” At that moment we were a team with a pact, defying the rules… even if it was just a bedtime curfew.

So with that, we collectively decided that the next thing to do was get a snack. Ben grabbed some popcorn and me and Sam went with a bowl of ice cream with a little hot fudge on top. We brought our treats back up to the guest room so we could continue talking.

Then, my guilty self slowly creeped in and I said it was time for bed, unfortunately. And both of them broke out singing “Happy Birthday Auntie Kiki.” It was simply… awesome. And so worth it. And they grabbed their pillows and went to bed.

So it was a great birthday. I miss that I wasn’t with Eric, but at my new “wise” age, I have learned that none of us can control the events life presents us. It’s what we make of the life we have. And the evening I had last night, was absolutely priceless and I will never forget it. And it was the kind of night ONLY an aunt could have with her two nephews. So when they sang Happy Birthday, was it actually my birthday yet? Sorry… all three of us are sworn to secrecy…

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